*I decided to write a letter to Kellogg’s because I’ve been unable to find a box of unfrosted strawberry pop tarts for years*
To the good people at Kellogg’s:
There comes a time in a man’s life when he wakes up in the morning and has an epiphany. An epiphany or moment of clarity, if you will, when he decides enough is enough, and an injustice must be corrected. That moment has arrived, and I must come to the defense of my beloved Unfrosted Strawberry Pop-Tarts as a product that represents the best of Kellogg’s. Also, I’m doing this for America.
I reflect on my childhood and my formative years fondly, and a part of that were my morning breakfasts. Imagine a young me, stressed and overwhelmed by the pressures of high school life. Buy young me had a small moment of bliss before facing the day: pop tarts. The unfrosted, true original of ideal breakfasts. They were perfection in toaster-based pastry form, and gave me the delight of the morning enjoying two unfrosted strawberry pop tarts with a hint of butter on top, setting me forth into the world a satisfied youngster. Yet now in my adult life, I can’t find said pop tarts, a prized relic of younger and happier days, anywhere.
It saddens me to go to the various grocery stores in my area, and go to the cereal and breakfast aisle, hopeful of finally locating a box of the only pop tart flavor I’ve ever eaten, and coming up empty. Where has this country’s supply of unfrosted strawberry pop tarts gone? Are they being kept in a secret bunker to be used when a zombie attack occurs? Have they been harvested for their strawberry goo in light of a strawberry crop shortage? Only you have these answers, not me.
Everyone knows the unfrosted strawberry pop tarts are still the best of all the varieties. Hot Fudge Sundae, Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough or Confetti Cupcake are not pop tarts flavors, they’re dessert flavors disguised as breakfast foods. How can I be expected to get nutrition out of your product when I can’t get the product I prefer? Not to mention the unfrosted strawberry have lower calorie, sodium and sugar content than the others. An important consideration when it has been proven time and time again that a kid’s diet filled with sugar and fat dramatically increases the risk of heart disease or diabetes.
Do the right thing and bring back the timeless classic that is the unfrosted strawberry pop tart. You’ll have restored the faith of at least one hungry consumer who grew up on the product that defines your company just as much as your cereal. Long live the bedrock of delicious breakfast food, and here’s to hoping they show up on my store shelves.